For the third time in three years, staff at the GNER railway ticket office had their Sunday afternoon slumbers interrupted by a flood of jubilant toon fans booking trips to London to see their heroes. 

This time of course it wasn't for the big day itself, but what for many will be an anti-climatic semi-final at the twin towers, albeit one that more "real" fans will be able to witness live than the Cup Final Corporate carve-up.

What was once a far-off dream for those who can recall losing to Chester, Exeter and Brighton to name but three, is now almost a annual event, along with a new face leading us out to be introduced to some overpaid offshoot of the monarchy.

Once again Trading Standards officers will be on double time all over Tyneside, as tat merchants peddle inflammable flags and hilarious jesters hats. Of course, victory over Chelsea will also open the floodgates for yet another Wembley Special Newspaper (the poor buggers must be desperate for something new to write - after all, you can only interview Bob Stokoe so many times.....)

More terrifying, especially for those of you with children, is the fact that we're only one match away from another banshee-like rendition of "Abide With Me", but also the dreaded Cup Final Record. 

Who knows what delights we're on the verge of? Our preference would be some Peruvian pan pipers (Little Nobby & The Handy Andes ?) performing a selection of terrace favourites. Let's face it, anything would be better than that "Bringing F*** All Back Home" allegedly penned by Sting.

Enough of this nonsense, let's return to the hotbed of soccer that is Birkenhead. 

Considering their position as the third team on Merseyside, Rovers have undergone a hell of an improvement since we faced them twelve years ago in the bizarre Wembley League Centenary tournament (and lost 2-0.) 

Prenton Park now has three rebuilt stands and considering the disgraceful amounts charged by Spurs and West Ham for their average away accommodation, £13 for a seat undercover with no posts to obscure the view is a bloody good deal. If I could change one thing however, i'd pass on the free twiglets that were almost impossible to avoid and came in a variety of chemically created "flavours."

Events on the pitch could have been a lot easier had more chances been taken, but our goalscoring yield continues to be good, with welcome contributions from midfield to augment the front two. 

However, after another Dyer run ended in his dragging a shot past the post, perhaps he might care to spend a little time in improving this area of his game - I'm sure England coach Peter Beardsley would find time to assist.

It's always a good sign when post-match opinions differ about our man of the match and while Barton and Domi were both valid candidates and Gallacher again ran his bits off, Aaron Hughes again gets my vote for an assured performance in yet another unfamiliar position. 

Once again the United team weren't shown cards of any colour, which is also pleasing, but Gallacher was perhaps a shade fortunate to avoid a yellow after twice continuing with a run and shot when the referee's whistle had already stopped play.        

So, another deserved victory and further proof that United have the right man at the helm, finally. Hopefully Bobby will manage to avoid the disgraceful pre-Wembley coasting that Rudi's team indulged in after the semi-final win over Spurs, played 6, won 0 if you dare to recall, with all the attacking menace of a toothless alligator.

A word about the Challinor long throws - dodgy. Dodgy in the sense that United just about coped, with one notable exception. Dodgy in that wherever the ball went out for a Rovers throw, Challinor was mysteriously able to chuck it in from one of the three specially made gaps in the perimeter, regardless of where the ball went out of play. 

However, it has to be said that the throw itself is a thing of beauty and a fearsome weapon from "the king of the flingers". Big Dunc came back to head more than one clear - one can only imagine the havoc he'd wreak if we had someone capable of making such elongated deliveries...   

Biffa


PS: Courtesy of NUFC.COM's answer to Cyril Fletcher, some random moans & observations:

1) Tranmere does not exist on any map and isn't signposted until you can see the turnstiles.

2) Attempts to generate atmosphere consisting of:
a) Brother James Brown shrieking "Ow I feel good" when they scored
b) PA announcer "getting the crowd going" in a sub-Alan Robson style.
c) "We will we will rock you" no further comment required.
d) Wagner / Apocalypse now / Kill the Wabbit music

3) The PA system tinnier than the tinniest child's toy transistor radio.

4) Theme to "The Rockford Files". Made me think of brown American cars and answer phones.

5) "Go Dave. Go Gola" banners handed out to kids as free advertising scam.

6) Couldn't sell all their tickets, (in spite of extremely reasonable £13 tariff). 6a) In spite of (6), selling home tickets to dozens of Toon fans and then kicking them out.

7) Having a "Cowshed End". Moo.

8) Jaguar advertising hoarding apparently hand-painted as part of infant school freize.

9) 25 minutes to get served in "The Prenton Park" (mitigated somewhat by engaging smile and magnificent chest of bar staff).
a) Charity Raffle in The Prenton Park featuring prizes such as "Three Platinum Club Tickets for any home Newcastle match", (which city is this pub in?), "Time system" (clock?), "Half a botle of vodka" (who drank the top half?), "30 square metres of carpet" (why?).

10) No pies. None. Not one single pie. Just a scabby burger (which I can still taste).

Send your outraged letters of protest about any of the above sexist, regionalist or foodist comments to us at NUFC.com.....and we'll ignore 'em. Duncan Mc.