38 mins: Debutant Kieron Dyer made a strong run directly into the box before being clumsily halted by an opponent. Alan Shearer converted the correctly-awarded penalty 1-0.

Half time: Deurne 0 Newcastle 1

68 mins: Following several moments of loose play culminated with the home side failing to clear their lines and Warren Barton knocking a loose ball from the left hand side of the box. 2-0.

76 mins: A fairly crucial deflection saw Jamie McClen's bendy curly twisty looping shot drop perfectly into the net from 25 yards out. 3-0.

85 mins: McClen turned provider down the United right, cutting the ball back from the byline for the oncoming James Coppinger to sweep the ball home from about eight yards. 4-0.

Half time: Deurne 0 Newcastle 4

Ruud Gullit said:
 
To follow

manager tbc:

To follow
 

24 hours after beginning their Dutch excursion with victory in 's-Hertogenbosch, Ruud Gullit's side made a trip of around 40 miles to the south east of the country for their second kickabout.

Seven changes to the starting lineup gave the side a slightly more experienced look, with a first glimpse of freshly-acquired Kieron Dyer and both Gary Speed and Alan Shearer returning to action.

There had been some discussion as to whether Dyer would actually play, but with Sky Sports in attendance, he duly appeared stripped for action. It must be recorded though that his facial expression when he saw the venue was of the "Where the **** am I?" variety.

Pre-match hopes of a cricket score (even a Durham-sized one) never looked like materialising until the home team tired, when a few late goals could have been added to those converted. 

A genuine family atmosphere at this amateur club was evident; youngsters playing football on the pitch and mums manning the pumps for the thirsty supporters. 

The travelling fans were made welcome (all announcements were conducted in Dutch and English), and the universal language of a stinking shot meant that the inevitable Silvo Maric miss after 75 minutes united both sets of supporters in sarcastic belly laughs.

The three centre backs tactic was tried again and Franck Dumas played sweeper, while Temuri Ketsbaia found himself on the left wing more often than not. Considering Dyer had never met most of his new colleagues before the game, he looked encouragingly sharp and an asset to the side.

Once the younger players got a go in the second half, United's performance became increasingly cohesive as McClen/Coppinger and Caldwell/Kerr understandings forged during junior and reserve games were reprised at senior level. Or maybe they were just fitter / trying harder to impress.

The final whistle brought a good-natured but test match-like pitch invasion, which with a minimum of stewarding meant that the players had to push through the great unwashed, openly holding pens and autograph books. The pressures of professional football - you have to feel for them.

Upon leaving the ground to walk back to the railway station (via a welcoming local hostelry), required picking a route through a field of parked bicycles. It's difficult to visualise that ever happening outside The Strawberry, even in a united Europe….

Biffa