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Bolton Wanderers	0 - 4	Newcastle United
Half time:	0 - 1
Score Sheet:
		Solano (41) Robert (62) Shearer (72) Bellamy (84)
	Teams
Jaaskelainen Whitlow Johnson Bergsson Charlton Barness Warhurst Southall Gardner Holdsworth Hansen		Given Hughes Elliott O'Brien Dabizas Robert Speed Solano Lee Shearer Bellamy
Substitutes:
(66) N'Gotty for Barness (66) Ricketts for Southall (69) Diawara for Charlton		Distin for Dabizas (86) Ameobi for Bellamy (86) Acuna for Speed (89)
Subs not used:
Nolan Wallace		Harper Bernard
Bookings:
Whitlow (47) Holdsworth (75)		Speed (23) Bellamy(55)
Sendings off:
Jaaskelainen (handball)(59)		None
Referee: Mike Riley (Leeds). What can you say? Cheered off by the away section at half-time and full-time but more an ironic response to the home fans' boos. Didn't give Nobby as offside for the first goal but then that was his linesman's job and waved play on when three of their players rolled around in agony - all of whom then got up looking remarkably fit. Had no choice with the sending off. Difficult to understand what prompted the home fan's ire - I'd be more upset with their keeper....
Attendance: 25,631 including a full and noisy away section. Former Magpie and Trotter Wyn Davies appeared on the field at half time to be loudly hailed by the Toon contingent, who joined in a mass chorus of "The Mighty Wyn".

41 mins Robbie Elliott drifted in from the left and put over a decent ball to the far post. Shearer nodded it across for Nolberto Solano who was plainly offside, to slide the ball in from inside the six yard box. Goal given.  1-0

Half time: Bolton 0 Newcastle 1

62 mins Following the keeper's aberration Solano, Shearer and Robert all stood over the ball for the free-kick. Something accurate was going to give the stand-in keeper trouble and although Shearer's power may have done the job, Laurent Robert's low curler was exactly what was required. 2-0

72 mins I'd just drawn breath ready to berate Shearer for not bothering to jump for a right wing cross when the ball landed at the feet of Robert. A split second later a perfect near post cross found Alan Shearer's head and United goal number 96 for Al was bulging the net.  3-0

84 mins Shearer scampered down the right and with Bellamy the only other blue shirt in attendance, Al's inch-perfect low ball to the far post was stuck away by the left foot of Craig Bellamy.  4-0

Full time: Bolton 0 Newcastle 4

Uncle Bobby said:

About his health: 

"I feel sorry for Gerard and hope he will be OK, I am fine.

"Perhaps I must be off my rocker to carry on at my age. But I cope with the pressure through sheer enjoyment and fulfilment of my life. I am on the pitch every day and I love it.

"I understand the pressure and the tension and at 1-0 today I wanted to go home.

"The intensity of the Premiership, the importance of winning and the escalation of money make it a vibrant industry, no question of that. Managers get sacked in September now.

"The need to be in Premiership like here at Bolton is intense. They are desperate to get enough points to stay in the division.

"The sending-off had a dramatic effect on the the game. The lad just seemed to overstep the line and the referee had no option.

"With our experience it probably became academic. We used the ball well and created chances and in fact got a bit careless."

About the free-kick:

"When Alan, Nobby and Laurent stood over the ball at Bolton even I did not know who was going to take the free-kick.

"At first I thought it was going to be Alan, then I changed my mind and went for Nobby. In the end, however, Laurent hit it into the back of the net.

"If I don't know what is going to happen, I hate to think what it must be like for a goalkeeper having to face a free-kick from this little lot.

"We practice free-kicks all the time and have plenty of discussions about them. But at the end of the day, I leave it to the players out on the field to decide who is going to take them as they know who has the best chance of scoring."

About Bellamy: 

"His penetration, his movement and his ability to get through and behind defenders is magnificent.

Craig is a bit of a talker to referees so I need to have some words with him about this."

Bolton boss Sam Allardyce commented:

"Jussi was outside the box so the referee applied the letter of the law.

"But it wasn't really about that, it was more about the first goal which was blatantly offside. That was the key issue because there was nothing between the sides.

"The officials have got it very, very wrong. We have video evidence and have been punished for something that's not our fault.

"When you've lost your last two home games, that's the last thing you want to happen in terms of decision-making from the officials."

Newcastle obtained their 500th Premiership point, starting the day on 499.

The Magpies won for the first time at the Reebok Stadium, having lost their only previous visit there 0-1 back in 1997.  

The modern game, with its high finance and poncy laws has robbed us of some of the finer things in football: bundling the keeper into the net and claiming a goal; keepers playing on with broken necks; teams down to nine men as ex-brickies clattered through the opposition and most magical of all, outfield players wearing the keeper's jersey.... 

The five substitutes rule means that should a 'keeper get sent off - a reasonably common occurrence nowadays, then up steps the substitute keeper and off comes a striker. Fairly entertaining but in no way the stuff of legend that has you reminiscing for years to come.

Outfield players wearing ill-fitting goalie shirts, flinging themselves at half-hit daisy cutters, is what this game is all about. We love it. 

Three cases in point: 

Vinnie Jones at St. James' Park six years ago, taking over from Paul Heald in the Wombles goal after receiving his second yellow for upending Les Ferdinand. OK, so we ended up winning 6-1 but Vinnie made a fantastic double-save and received a standing ovation from the home fans which he acknowledged with a majestic salute. 

Kevin Brock at Birmingham in 1992, who replacing the ailing Tommy Wright at half-time with United 3-2 up. Within minutes David Speedie had welcomed Kevin with a vicious left foot shot, Speedie's boot making contact with Brock's head and not the ball which left him concussed for the remaining forty minutes.

Did his dazed state impede his performance? Not at all. With Derek Wright administering smelling salts at every available opportunity Brock went on to keep a clean sheet. 

The infamous 1986 visit to Upton Park where United fielded three different keepers: Martin Thomas, Chris Hedworth and Peter Beardsley collectively conceding eight goals as Newcastle crashed to a defeat that still looks like a misprint in the record books. 

So did Jussi Jaaskelainen have all this in mind when he abandoned his penalty area fifteen minutes into the second half of this encounter? I'd like to think so. The ball was flung in with some menace, the bounce was awkward and Shearer was certainly sniffing around for anything that may have gone astray. No need. Out came Jaaskelainen and leapt like a ballerina to palm the ball away from no-one, fully four yards out of his area.

Even more stupendous was that the keeper knew full well that he'd get a red card and that there was no green-jersey wearer on the Bolton bench. Top marks. No wonder he flung his shirt at Hansen with a flourish and sprinted down the tunnel before a furious Sam Allardyce got the chance to land a boot up his rear end. 

So did this incident breathe some life into a stale, dull Premiership encounter? Not really, we'd had plenty to get our teeth into already. This was just an unexpected bonus.

In his post-match comments Bobby revealed that he didn't know who would take the free-kick conceded by the keeper's handball. He claimed this was because we have such an array of talent able to bend and swerve and thump balls up over and around walls. Possibly. However, uppermost in his mind was probably the first half pantomime served up by Nolberto Solano and Laurent Robert.

In a good position near the left edge of the Bolton box, the Frenchman ran over the ball and and the Peruvian shaped to shoot - only to cunningly feed Robert, as he continued his run past the wall. Sadly that pass was poor and Robert fell on his backside in an effort to retrieve it. Almost as good as the Everton triple by-pass last year.... 

Other memories of the opening 45 minutes revolved around the Welsh wizard, the man currently "on fire", Craig Bellamy. His pace and workrate are both excellent, it's just that his one-on-one finishing is about as poor as Imre Varadi's.... Exactly how he manages to find the keeper with such unerring accuracy time and time again is remarkable.

Whether the keeper stands up, sits down or keeps moving, Bellamy will lift it high or aim low at the dead-centre of the keeper's torso. Thankfully he managed to get it all wrong and find the back of the net against the mackems.... 

Robert Lee apparently had a fantastic game in midfield, ignoring all the contract furore and putting in a general's performance that we will miss so badly. Not from my seat he didn't.

His reception at the start of the game was a good one, with most clapping or singing his name. The rest who shook their heads weren't quite so audible, though. However, it didn't take much for the patience to snap. Two deadly accurate balls into the lower tier within the space of a minute and then a lack-lustre challenge in a dangerous position certainly caused a sea-change of opinion in our vicinity. 

Rob has been with United for just over nine years and has been a fantastic player and a great servant to the club. No argument there. However, his part in the Ruud Gullit saga wasn't wholly as victim in my opinion and the book release and testimonial games weren't handled well. Steve Howey must be wondering when his 11 years of service will be recognised by the club. If only he'd had it written in to his last contract.... 

Shay Given came and retreated for a through ball that Aaron Hughes ended up foiling with a fantastic last-ditch tackle and at the other end Nicos Dabizas missed an absolute sitter after Solano's free-kick ricocheted off the wall.

Bellamy and Hughes both crossed poorly after getting behind the Bolton defence and it seemed inevitable that half-time would arrive goalless. And then from out of the blue - the lucky new away kit blue - former Trotter Elliott sent over a fine cross and an unmarked Shearer nodded across for Solano to finish off.

The goalscorer was undoubtedly offside but the linesman assured Mike Riley that the goal should stand after a brief consultation. Good lad. 

Robert's free-kick from the Jaaskelainen blunder was perfect. It just had to be reasonably accurate and reasonably firm and Robert did both. Shearer's power might just have hit Hansen or the wall but Robert's accuracy was spot-on.

The stand-in got a hand to the ball and who knows whether Jaaskelainen might have saved it but goals three and four weren't preventable by any keeper. Robert crossed for Shearer, bringing about a rousing chorus of Al's new song. And Shearer's pin-point cross rewarded the hard-working Bellamy who deserved his late goal. 

Just time then for Shearer to see a possible second saved well by Hansen and Shola Ameobi to suffer one of those horrible Geoff Thomas moments. He was played through and Hansen came but then retreated realising his error in judgement.

A simple lob was all that was needed, but Shola scuffed it horribly and Hansen had time to pick up the ball as it dribbled pathetically into the box.

The introduction of Clarence Acuna and Sylvain Distin seemed a little pointless, all Acuna had time to do was gather back his flowing locks and put his headband in place.... 

Niall MacKenzie

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