35 mins:  Robert rocket number one - Leazes. 1-0

Half time:  Newcastle 1 Tottenham 0

55 mins:  Robert rocket number two - Gallowgate. 2-0

59 mins:  Robert corner from the Strawberry side, Shearer shot/side foot / poke home from six yards. 3-0

Full time:  Newcastle 4 Tottenham 0

Sir Bobby said about MotM Robert:

David Pleat:

"At half time, you could say that, in a strange way, our passing dictated the tempo of the first half.

"Robert's wonderful goal put us slightly on the back foot, we were dealing with a couple of injuries at half time, but in truth, Newcastle raised the tempo dramatically and we couldn't stay with the game.

"When you raise the tempo dramatically like that and score in that spell when you're playing so well, I'm afraid that's curtains. The rest of the game becomes almost null and void.

"We've been well smacked, we've got to put our hand up to two great Robert goals and I've also got to question some of our defending.

"But fortunately in football, there's another game not too far away."

100th & 101st Newcastle goals for Alan Shearer at St. James' Park. 53 at the Leazes (including his first) and 48 at the Gallowgate end (including his 100th)

Goal number 8 of the season for Laurent Robert, who only managed 5 last season and grabbed 10 in 2001/02.

37 goals for the club in all competitions this season, 16 for Shearer and 8 for Robert - next up is Shola with 4.

December will be magic again sang Kate Bush,....unless you're a Spurs fan on Tyneside:

Cockerels - recent SJP Stuffings:

13.12.03 Newcastle 4 Spurs 0
29.12.02 Newcastle 2 Spurs 1 (not really a stuffing, more a mild seasoning)
22.12.99 Newcastle 6 Spurs 1 (FAC played early that season)
28.12.96 Newcastle 7 Spurs 1

It was round about this time last year that a certain former England striker set us on the road to victory over Everton; his guided missile of a shot, homing in on its intended Gallowgate end target with a power and precision that the US military would doubtless envy.

Now we're very far away from being soothsayers here at NUFC.com, but it was only a few days ago that, glass in hand, one of our number bemoaned the lack of genuine on-field excitement at the club and wrote in his Liverpool report: 

With memories of yuletide hammerings against them still fresh in the mind, let's hope for some seasonal cheer and lift off against Spurs - with someone else scoring a goal rather than the number nine.  

Certainly the reaction from the stands in recent weeks would suggest that we had lost our ability to capture fan's hearts and minds - a certain contractual obligation had taken over as far as home game attendance was concerned, with little in the way of genuine excitement or controversy to stimulate the senses.

People weren't quite knitting or doing word puzzles to while away the time, but there have been depressing defeats and forgettable stalemates, plus a couple of decent wins over average opposition when we succeeded with the minimum of flair and zest. Gone were the rousing fightbacks, the great goals or even the late strikes to annoy the early leavers. Things had just gone a little stale, goals bobbled in rather than fizzing or flashing, with edge-of-the seat, hairs-on-the neck moments at a premium. 

For just over thirty five minutes this game was a cagey affair, with the powder blue shirts of the visitors massing in numbers round the centre circle to deprive us of any space in which to create moves. Our defence was called upon once or twice and there wasn't much to choose between the sides, at that stage.

Again we seemed to be a little disorganised, with Bernard's jousting down the left the only genuine width available to us, Dyer and Ameobi both failing to take up suitable positions to try and outflank Spurs, leaving Robert to alternate between each wing.

Then for the first time in the game, Ameobi deigned to chase for a forward pass and use his physical presence to upset the Spurs backline with a sideways run along the edge of the area. The ball ended up at Robert's feet, although the awkwardness of the angle meant that the Frenchman had to swivel in order to get his shot away.

To say he managed it doesn't begin to capture the force and direction of his effort, that was in the Leazes net before the players could react or the crowd shout encouragement. That was enough to separate the two sides at the interval and of sufficient quality to block out an otherwise undistinguished tussle.

Then in a typically egalitarian gesture after the break, the less-than-100% fit Frenchman then treated fans at the opposite end of the ground to another projectile from his boot that flew past Keller. If this had been a tennis match, Robert would have been fined for net abuse....what a joyous strike to light up this match and city far more than a thousand fairy lights in Fenwick's window or Greys monument.

This wonder goal prompted a reaction from the jubilant home ranks that ranks among the best Robert has received during his time at the club - a worthy response for a player who has shown an improved attitude this season and seen his stock rise as a result. Gone is the website and thankfully banished also the negative body language that was reminiscent of Ginola on a bad day. 

In it's place is a more willing servant, but with that extra element that places him above most of his contemporaries - you don't always see it, but you know it's in there somewhere and when it comes out, wow. That's what you come for, that's why you pay the money and put up with being ripped off, lied to, threatened and generally patronised - just to see some bloke leather the ball in like that occasionally. And two in twenty minutes? Marvellous.... and a payback to Sir Bobby for persevering though the tantrums and sticking with the lad. Hopefully what works for the French (remember Bernard had his turn as prodigal son) will prove equally successful with Peruvians.

By the end we had our groove back, players were moving into position apparently effortlessly and balls were going to feet. Substitutions broke up the party a little, but it was noticeable how Solano wanted to be on and join in the fun - his first couple of passes drawing oohs and aahs from some over-excited punters. The confidence was almost tangible across the pitch, but in the case of  Robert had been there from the start.

The paper hats from White Hart Lane though withered and died. Carr could do simply nothing right on what was meant to be his big chance to impress future employers and potential acolytes. Keane looked to have borrowed the personal demons of his Manchester United namesake judging by his increasingly bitter, snarling body language, while Anderton did a passable Hugh Grant impression for much of the afternoon - didn't offend anyone and was often spotted, but appeared not to achieve anything tangible. 

Even that lunatic Tarrico couldn't be bothered to launch himself at anyone, while Kanoute was in full gallic sulk mode. Finally we managed to slay the ghost of Gus Poyet at the umpteenth time of asking.....which was nice.

But never mind Robert's goals, almost as worthy of note were the crosses from the flanks that Spurs were incapable of dealing with. So often his corners fail to clear the first defender to the audible frustration of the crowd, but today his centres were delivered like precision strikes and with the help of the goalscoring talisman, hit their intended target.

That would have pleased the captain - and the only people who seemed less than overjoyed about it were those clutching betting slips with "Shearer hat trick" scribbled on them. The Milburn stat we can't talk about edges into view over the horizon - I hope that it continues to galvanise him and spur him on, as there's nobody else with even a semblance of his hunger, intelligence or front coming through behind him.

We try to ration our negativeness when it comes to Ameobi, but it should be recorded again here that for the second time in recent weeks, he reacted badly to what in my view was justified criticism from the front section of the Leazes stand to an opening contribution that bordered on the minimalist - again finding time to dismiss a shout from the crowd with a wave and a stare although he was yet to touch the ball at that stage in the game. 

There are better ways to make your point, like competing for the ball without fouling an opponent and having more awareness of and interest in the placement of colleagues on the field, rather than the precise width of sock turned over ones' knee.

Don't get me wrong, I desperately want generations of kids to have Shola posters on their wall (although I'd rather they were of anyone than Jonny Wilko...) I want a debate as to whether he should be in the full England team, I want 50,000 Geordies singing his name. But all I see is empty posturing and languidness that looks like lethargy from behind the goal. 

Perhaps the last thing Sir Bobby should do at 2.55pm is kick Ameobi's backside down the tunnel and on to the field - in this game it took thirty minutes of general crowd restlessness and an overweight man in an ill-fitting away top calling him a big soft jessie (or words to that effect) to get his dander up......world at his feet and he doesn't know it. If he doesn't believe that "Ameobi 9" will be the biggest selling toon shirt in a couple of years, then why should I?

Returning to Shearer, chasing the Milburn record is an objective that becomes less ridiculous with each passing game and goal and remains the biggest personal challenge that is left to him, if you take the view that winning cups and leagues single-handedly is beyond our talisman. Quite simply, making that double century of strikes could be the sole tangible achievement that he walks away from Newcastle with - an absolute tragedy, but an increasingly inevitable reality.

Great goals, great to see these pompous arrogant gobshi*tes once again sent on their way back to the smoke with nowt except sore legs from walking up all them stairs. Every goal against them, every victory, every point is a blow struck against their arrogant posturing, rip-off ticketing and all round smug falseness, even if it is ever-so-slightly less enjoyable to beat a Pleat side rather than a Hoddle one. Do you get the impression I'm not overly fond of going up the Seven Sisters Road?

Three cheers for Robert, three cheers for Shearer, enjoy the day, vive la toon and let's worry about Charlton next week when a depleted defence comes face to face with the maverick Di Canio. It's seldom dull here, any more - thankfully. 

Biffa

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